


The Anatomy of a Bully

by Maraudererasmut



Series: Wolfstar Shorts [4]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: F/M, Friendship, Gen, Hogwarts, Library, Lily Evans Potter & Severus Snape Friendship, M/M, Marauders, Marauders Friendship, Marauders' Era, Remus Lupin & Lily Evans Potter Friendship, not smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-13
Updated: 2018-09-13
Packaged: 2019-07-11 16:55:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,573
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15976517
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Maraudererasmut/pseuds/Maraudererasmut
Summary: Remus decides to stay in and study instead of joining the boys outside. Once in the library, he bumps into an unexpected friend. (This is a sister story to "What Does Love Feel Like?", the two occur at the same time)





	The Anatomy of a Bully

**Author's Note:**

> This is the Sister Story to "What Does Love Feel Like?", following Remus as he separates from the group. The stories can be read in either order, and they both loosely tie in with each other.
> 
> This story is also part of a series that contains some... ahem... smut. If you don't care for the sexy stuff, this is one of the better short stories for you. However, they all tie in together. 
> 
> Once again, I'm still quite new to this! Constructive criticism is always welcome!

The sun was out, blazing in the sky, reflecting tiny stars that danced along the lake’s surface. Students were throwing fanged frisbees and casting spells, excitedly taking advantage of the warm spring weather. James, Sirius and Peter were by the lake, teasing the giant squid playfully and celebrating their favourite time of the year. Remus Lupin was absent from the typical marauder picture, choosing instead of indulge his favourite past time: avoiding people and tucking himself into a good book in a nook of the library.

 

Remus entered the library, taking in the warm scents of parchment and leather, a thin smile spreading across his face. On occasion, his best friends became insufferable and he needed a momentary respite from the hustle and bustle of their hectic lives. He was also avoiding Sirius to the best of his ability, taking solace in the fact that the cocky, smug, arrogant, no-good, rotten, devilishly handsome sonofabitch would never be caught dead studying here. Remus inhaled deeply and let the atmosphere of the room clear his thoughts away from Sirius, with that coy smile and long tangled hair. 

 

Remus wove through the stacks, avoiding small clusters of students studying for their exams between the towering bookshelves. There was one particular corner of the library that Remus had called “home” since Third Year, and it was rarely used by any other student, even when the library became busy. Past the books on negative potion interactions and through the section on notable charms from the 14th century, Remus expected to approach his empty table nestled in a dark corner. Instead of a welcoming chair with a ripped cushion, there was a mass of orange hair that seemed to be deep in thought.

 

“Oh, hullo,” Remus greeted the hair. It swished around and revealed a delicate pale face, freckled slightly, with startled bright green eyes viewing him cautiously. 

 

“Hello, Lupin,” Lily greeted him tearsly. 

 

“Please, no need for formality. It’s Remus,” the boy responded, giving the girl a warm smile.

 

Her expression softened slightly and her shoulders visibly relaxed. 

 

“Remus,” she said, a kind smile slowly spreading across her face. “Where’s your… possy?”

 

“Outside,” Remus laughed, his grin getting wider. “They don’t seem to realize that exams are actually important. It’s rather curious, if you ask me.”

 

Lily let out a small chuckle and rolled her eyes. 

 

“If I didn’t know better, I’d wonder how they ever got through these past six years,” she retorted, playing along with Remus’ teasing.

 

“They had me, apparently,” the boy said, only half jokingly. “Um… actually, would you mind if I joined you? I’m particularly attached to this corner of the library. It has the best access to Defense Against The Dark Arts books, with an emphasis on magical creatures. It’s a specialty of mine.”

“Of course,” Lily responded, shifting her chair over to make room for Remus at the table. “I’m quite fond of it myself. Some of the best charms can be found nearby. Those 14th century wizards really knew how to push boundaries.” She let out a small laugh that was mirrored by Remus’.

 

“Accio chair,” Remus said with a wave of his wand, and second desk chair came skittering around the corner of the book cases and came to an abrupt halt beside Lily’s. Remus sat down and lazily flicked his wand, summoning two cups of coffee, a small flask of milk, several cubes of sugar and a shaker filled with cinnamon. “Care for a cup?”

 

Lily stared incredulously at Remus for a moment before quickly gathering her composure.

 

“Yes, please. Thank you, Remus.” A brief silence. “Wordless magic. I’m impressed. Where did you learn that? And how, may I ask, did you conjure food? Isn’t it…”

 

“Oh, yeah, no, I didn’t conjure it,” Remus interrupted with a chuckle. “We have some house elf friends down in the kitchens. They often keep some coffee set aside for me. It comes in handy while studying.” Remus gestured towards the spread in front of them. With another easy movement from his wand, the milk floated towards his cup and poured a small amount into his steaming black coffee, creating a swirl of white and releasing a strong fragrance in the air. 

 

“And the wordless magic is just a result of laziness at this point. I’ve poured more cups of coffee than I’d care to admit, to be honest. Milk?” The pitcher was floating near Lily’s cup, and she gently nodded to indicate that she would like some as well. “Unfortunately,” Remus continued, “Wingardium Leviosa seems to be the extent of my practical wordless spell list.” He laughed a bright, charming laugh, one that was rarely heard outside of the marauders.

 

Another flick of the wand and the cinnamon floated and shook itself eagerly above Remus’ cup, dusting his coffee, saucer and the table around it. Lily suppressed a giggle, which Remus responded to with his own. “And it appears that I have yet to master that fully,” he mused.

 

“Cinnamon?” Lily asked, as the smell wafted through the air and filled their corner. “Around Christmas time, I understand, but in the spring?”

 

“I have particular tastes,” Remus responded sheepishly. “James calls me out on it as well. Apparently it’s quite unheard of to put cinnamon in coffee in the wizarding community.”

 

At the mention of James’ name, Lily’s face fell slightly, and her eyes drifted down towards her cup. A silence fell between the two newfound friends as they sipped their drinks and avoided eye contact. 

 

“Why are you friends with them?” Lily spoke, after a minute or two. “I mean, you seem so friendly, and they’re…”

 

“A bit obnoxious?” Remus offered. Lily’s smile tentatively returned. It seemed that teasing the marauders was an excellent way for Remus to ingratiate himself with her. 

 

“To say the least,” Lily responded, holding her cup in her long, delicate fingers and inhaling the strong smell of coffee. “They just…” She trailed off for a moment. Remus remained silent, allowing the girl to collect her thoughts. “They’re cruel,” she finished, a note of abruptness and contempt in her voice.

 

“On occasion,” Remus agreed with a shrug. “Not intentionally, of course, but they do sometimes get carried away with their incessant pranking.” Lily raised an eyebrow skeptically before Remus continued. “They really are kind hearted. They treat me well. Not many people do…” Remus gestured towards his face, indicating the scars running across his nose, chin, cheek and eyebrow. “It’s hard to be different,” Remus concluded.

 

A look of pity spread across Lily’s face. It never really occurred to her that Remus was self-conscious about his scars. He seemed so happy and confident when he was around his friends, it was difficult to picture him as someone who worried what his peers thought. She nodded earnestly towards Remus, realizing that she wasn’t alone in feeling like an outsider. Among her family, she was a freak, as emphasized by her sister. At Hogwarts, she was an anomaly. A wizarding joke. A  _ Mudblood. _

 

“But you know that,” Remus laughed, trying to break the tension in their nook. Lily smiled a sad smile, knowing that Remus was thinking along the same lines as her. 

 

“I do,” she responded softly, raising her cup to her mouth and taking a long, slow sip. 

 

The two sat in silence while they enjoyed their drinks, sounds of rukus and joy seeping in from the field outside. Most Hogwarts students enjoyed spring; they lived for it, thrived in it, reveled in the beauty. Not Remus. He hated spring. Springtime meant allergies. Springtime meant heat. Worst of all, springtime meant leaving his Hogwarts family and returning home. Leaving nights running around with the marauders and returning to being locked in a cage in the basement once a month.  _ For your own safety. _

 

Remus’ thoughts were interrupted by Lily hesitantly starting the conversation again. He could hear the caution in her voice, the strain that it took for her to talk about this.

 

“What about Severus?”

 

“What about him?” Remus responded, despite knowing exactly what she was asking.

 

“Your friends… James… they bullied him. Tortured him, even. How can you call them kind people when they do things like that?” A hint of anger flashed through her bright green eyes.

 

“Severus didn’t seem to think too highly of you, if I recall correctly,” Remus responded. He immediately realized the sharpness with which he said that and felt bad about his retort. 

 

Tears welled up in Lily’s eyes slightly as she remembered, but she blinked them away, quickly.

 

“He never lifted anyone into the air and turned them upside down with the sole intention of humiliating them, that’s for certain,” she snapped. 

 

Remus looked down at the coffee resting in his hands, the guilt evident on his face. 

 

“No. No he didn’t,” he muttered softly into his drink. 

 

Another silence, broken only by sounds drifting in from outside the castle.

 

“I don’t condone James’ actions last year,” Remus began after collecting his thoughts. “And I do sincerely regret not stopping him. I should have. As a prefect… as his friend… as a human being. What I did was wrong…”

 

Another pause.

 

“James has this way about him. He’s very protective of his...pack. If someone hurts one of his own, he retaliates. Sometimes, his retaliations are… in excess.”

 

Remus continued to stare into his coffee, as if it had all the answers that he was looking for.

 

“I don’t condone what James did, but… I do understand it.”

 

Lily looked at Remus, watching him stare down his cup, seeing the hurt painted across his face. She remained silent. As much as she despised what James did, she could tell that Remus strongly felt he was justified. Lily wanted to hear that explanation for herself.

 

“Severus Snape is a cruel little man,” Remus said abruptly. 

 

Lily sat in her chair, trying to ignore the fact that this year had been her loneliest year at Hogwarts. She had lost her best friend and her dignity at the end of last year, having no one that she could turn to for affection or comfort. She wiped a tear away with the back of her hand and managed a weak smile in Remus’ direction.

 

“Not as cruel as other people I know,” she tried to joke. It came across as more of an insult than she intended. Lily hoped she didn’t hurt Remus’ feelings by mocking his friends during this sensitive moment. 

 

“I don’t know if that’s true…” Remus said ruefully, watching specks of cinnamon float around his cup. 

 

“May I…” Lily started hesitantly. “May I ask what happened?”

 

Remus let out a sharp, dry laugh at some joke that Lily seemed to not be a part of.

“You can ask,” he taunted, “But I won’t be able to tell you.”

 

Silence fell again. Lily slowly raised a hand and cautiously grazed Remus’ arm. He flinched and abruptly looked up at her, before realizing that her gesture was one of kindness and concern. He softened slightly and tried to smile meekly at Lily. 

 

“I’m sorry, Lily. I was lost in my own thoughts for a bit. I didn’t mean to be so… Blunt.”

 

Lily tried to return the smile, but she was still startled from Remus’ reaction to her hand. 

 

“Yes. I’m sorry. You do deserve to know, at least some of the truth. At least the parts that I can tell you…”

 

His words were cryptic, but Lily was determined to find out what kind of slight Severus could have done that would have provoked James’ reaction.

 

“Yes, please,” she said softly.

 

“Well, as you may have noticed, I’m slightly… different...than most of my peers,” Remus began. “I have a...condition. One that I am very ashamed of. One that could…” Remus considered his phrasing for a moment. “One that could be dangerous.”

 

“What-” Lily began, but was abruptly cut off.

 

“I don’t want to disclose it. Please understand that, Lily. This is already difficult for me… Sharing this with you.”

 

“I’m sorry,” Lily muttered, but was greeted with a soft, small smile from Remus.

 

“Don’t be. You didn’t know...Anyway...Severus Snape… discovered my condition. He taunted me, tormented me, treated me like a lower class citizen.” Remus wistfully stared at the bookcase in front of him. “He said some especially nasty things,” he mused.

 

Lily looked down, remembering the pain she felt when Severus did the same to her.

 

“Now, believe me when I say, I don’t mind when that happens. I am used to it by now. But James… Oh James… He would have none of it. He warned Severus, perhaps a little too harshly. Severus continued, making our lives challenging. Trying with all his might to get us expelled and me… revealed. The night before James’...incident… Severus approached me in the hallway. Words were exchanged. Not particularly kind ones at that.”

 

Remus set his cup down with a clink and met Lily’s green eyes, glistening with emotion.

 

“I learned some new ways to hate myself that night. Things that I had never considered until Severus so kindly pointed them out.”

 

Lily opened her mouth as if to say something, but closed it again. She knew what was coming next. 

 

“James never heard what he said. He only found out when he discovered me crying in the dorm. Yes, that’s right,” Remus smirked as Lily’s face contorted with pity-sorrow. “I cried. It happens to men, too,” Remus admitted cheekily, winking. His face sobered slightly as he continued. “I don’t agree with James’ reaction, but let me tell you, Severus was not innocent in all this,” Remus said with finality. His story ended and the two just stared, each one assessing the other. Lily broke the silence first.

 

“I’m sorry that happened to you, Remus,” she said kindly, gently bringing her hand to his and placing it delicately on top of his scarred fingers. 

 

“It’s fine. It’s life. Or… my life, at least.”

 

“It shouldn’t be,” Lily scorned.

 

Remus coyly grinned at the girl in front of him, a look of confusion crossing her face.

 

“There. That’s it. Now you get it.”

 

Lily cocked an eyebrow and tilted her head slightly.

 

“That’s James, Lily. That’s what he believes in. James believes that life shouldn’t be like that. That nobody deserves to be treated like that, no matter their origin or story. That’s James.”

 

A look of realization flashed across Lily’s face. She pulled her hand away and grabbed her coffee, raising it to her lips. She wanted a moment before she spoke, and her drink provided an excellent opportunity.

 

“Fiercely protective,” she said quietly once the cup was lowered.

 

“Exactly,” Remus agreed, a bit of happiness returning to his smile. “James Potter is the reason that I am where I am now. He’s the reason that I have friends who love me and accept me. He… Well, he broke my shell. He was my first friend. Ever. And despite his arrogance and annoyingly disruptive attitude, he is one of the best people I have ever had the pleasure of knowing.”

 

The conversation was over. Lily had nothing more to contribute and Remus had nothing more to share. The two Gryffindors sat at their table in the corner of the library and finished their coffees in peace.

 

James’ handsome face appeared briefly in Lily’s mind and for the first time, she didn’t despise him; she understood him. 


End file.
